i’m marvelled. tonight i watched a lunar eclipse. total eclipse of the moon. something we’ve read about in books, something we’ve heard about in school, but not something i’ve seen before. i sat outside in the frigid air with the company of a good friend and watched a shadow slowly overcome that giant nightlight in the sky. slowly but surely, that nightlight turned into simply a rock. without the sun’s light shining on it, it looks like nothing more than a giant chunk of dirt suspended up there in that pitch blackness. how does it just so happen that the sun, the earth, and the moon all line up just perfectly for a few hours? beats me. if you haven’t seen it yet, go take a look.
it only seemed fit that during this time of marvelling at the sky, we’d also talk about everything else that marvels us. God. gravity. space. heaven. dimensions. Jesus. money. good. evil. society. music. people.
as i walked 20 feet from a building to my car tonight and my entire body went numb with the cold, i couldn’t help but thinking of a warmer place. a place where issues consisted not of getting a good grade on a test or getting to work on time or performing a song and singing in tune, but of real life. of people, of families, of love, of pain, of life. a place where everything surrounding me was completely and undeniably sustained by God. where i could sit out on the beach at night in a lawn chair and wait for the tide to come and swallow up my feet. where the stars shone brighter than anything i’ve ever imagined and created constellations different than anything i’d seen before. where the warm salty breeze rustled the hair resting on my back and i would close my eyes and i would feel. i wouldn’t feel something specific or something familiar, but just feel. i miss the simplicity of it all. living life without all the extras, all the junk. just embracing what life really is. i miss that. i wish i could feel that warmth right now.
“you don’t know but that’s okay. you might find me anyway. don’t you know that i belong arm in arm with you, baby? in a town that’s cold and gray we will have a sunny day. don’t you know that i belong arm in arm with you, baby?”—regina spektor
“perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. it will keep you cramped & insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you & a shitty first draft. i think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won’t have to die. the truth is that you will die anyway & that a lot of people who aren’t even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they’re doing it.”—anne lamott